(118) Two Sides To Every Story.

A very happy new year to you all. Thank you for stopping by my piece of the web this year.
Best wishes and Love Ian X.

(117) The List

(116) A Stocking Filler.

So its all over for another year. Just the expense and waistline to work off.
I still have the tail end of chocolates and red wine to finish off sigh! It's got to be done.

Lush - De-Luxe (Official Video)

(II5) Tis The Season To Be Jenny.

A happy Christmas to you all.

(114) They Are Tears Of Joy, Surely?

Christmas is fast approaching. Have I done any Christmas shopping or any captions? Nope.
Well here is a tale of retail hell and the theory that ladies have an extra shopping chromosome.

(113) See The Piece Of Sawdust In Another's Eye And Not Notice The Wooden Beam In Your Own Eye.

Hi gals and guys. I hope you are all well. I am still struggling with health, time and silly work shifts.
But here is a new short caption all fresh, crispy and new.

(112) A learning Process.

Sorry for the lack of posts. My brain is sometimes beyond my control.
 For a change, I have made a nice caption. It is a rewrite of a very early caption long lost in blog heaven. It got a little long and could have been longer just remembered something I was going to put in but forgot.
 This is for Kaaren. Thank you for the comments and for always seeing the positive. X

The Shamen - Move any mountain

R I P Craig Gill

Craig Gill the drummer for the Inspiral Carpets.
Such an important band in my life. Just been reliving some tracks on Youtube.
Those were the days.

INSPIRAL CARPETS "beast inside" LIVE 21790

Inspiral Carpets - The Dome ( Channel 4 1991)

AWOL.

Apologies for going AWOL. I had a few technical issues. Hopefully abnormal service well be resumed this weekend. X

(111) A Reflection.

It's better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and leave no doubt.

HAWKWIND-SEEING IT AS YOU REALLY ARE

(110) Halloween. Dressed To Depress

I've have not had many trick or treaters, I will just have to eat the sweets myself. SUGAR RUSH !

"My Name is Mud" Primus - 1993 Live from MTV's Haunted House Party

(109) Halloween. Your Loss Is Their Gain.

Halloween is very nearly here. Yikes!

(108) How Low Can You Go?

Just a caption I made to fill a small hole.

Status Quo - Down down 1975

(107 )GIF Guzzler.

Ever six seconds. John relived his nightmare. The unrelenting cock would unload into his mouth.
although but a brief second his taste buds captured every flavour of the unwanted deposit. If only he could spit it out but every time he was forced to close his jaw swill the goo all around his gums and
swallow. He could feel the copious gloop slowly slither down his throat.Maybe you can see his disgust? The never-ending horror of this curse. He wants to vomit,scream. maybe even beg for release. Again ever six seconds thousands of times a day.
 John loved receiving  oral but his girlfriend Jullie hated it. Even more so when he insisted she swallowed every drop. He knew her abhorrence but John loved the dominance and seeing a woman on her knees before him forced to take his seed.  
 Jullie could not take his humiliation and bullying anymore. And when she left him she cast a spell to leave him in GIF hell.
 Is the internet immortal? Every six second,every six seconds.

average white band Lets go round again.mov

(106) The Art Of Persuasion.

Well, I failed to get the Nobel prize for litriture, Again!
There are two caption contests to plug. http://degradeddamsels.blogspot.co.uk/  and  http://tganderson.blogspot.co.uk/  both fine blogs to visit and take part if you feel the urge.
I often have the urge but very rarely the energy.

Fuzzbox - Love Is The Slug (Official Music Video)

(105) Just Hanging Around.

Stranglers.. Hanging Around live in studio in black and white

(104) Dee Flowered.

Hello. I hope you have all had a good week. I've cricked my neck so with that and my aching back and shoulder I have been shuffling around  like Quasimodo.
 I made this caption after reading the following caption on Dee Mentia's blog. http://deelusionsofgrandeur.blogspot.co.uk/2016/09/i-got-idea-from-youtube-right.html.
I thought of this follow up straight away. Sorry, I could not find a better photo. I was hoping to find
two butch lesbians with strap ons. Hours I had to spend watching lesbian porn. Oh, how I suffer for my art. My arm and hand are now aching too!

The Groundhogs - Split Pt. 2 (1971) "Live Audio" London concert. 1971.

(103) The Spy Who Is Left Out In The Cold,

(102) The The Fart Caption.

Normal service well be resumed A S A P. I managed to get cut of the internet yet again.
Well just to prove what a loss to the world wide web that is.

Joni Mitchell Both sides now on Mama Cass Show 1969

(101) So What's Gone Wrong?

This is not the caption I was going to post today but the one I started kind of got away from me and I ran out of time and enthusiasm. And also as i could not find the right photo for the theme  etc etc.
 Anyway. This one was made for  Natasha at http://natashascoercedcaps.blogspot.co.uk/.
  Its this or a fart joke. but I might post that in the week anyway. I am so classy.

(100) The Lost Case Book.The DinkyWinkie Berries.

For this the one hundredth caption spectacular. I am sure you were expecting glitz, dancing girls, performing wombats on unicycles.  Erm well no sorry about that but a longer two part caption
from the newly discovered unpublished notes of Doctor Whatson where we discover Homes was
not always the great detective but did get his man.
(Names have been changed to prevent lawsuits and copyright.)

UFO - Doctor Doctor (live 1975)

(99)The Jokes On Him.

I am not sure what I have done to deserve it as I feel my recent postings have been a bit lame and below Parr. But this blog is now being viewed around 1000 times a day and today 3200 so far!
 Thank you all so much for stopping by, it really does mean a lot to me.
 A cautionary tale. Do not eat pizza and blog at the same time. I did and it fell of the plate on to
the computer screen to slide down on to the keyboard. What a mess!
 

The Smiths - That Joke isn't Funny Anymore

Labour Day?

Its labour day but you guys get the day of work? Erm?

(98) Double Take.

Why do Sundays fly by so fast? Time never seems to pass this quickly when I am at work.
Another short caption but hopefully my new found Microsoft word skills well start to speed things
up. Just maybe, Don't hold your breath.

Captain Beefheart - Mirror Man (Pinkpop Festival 1974)

(97) A Fine line Between Genius And Insanity.

I just spotted this photon on Joanna's blog. http://joannastgcaptions.tumblr.com/ and it made me think.

(96)Running Late

An Olympic caption and recent events gave me a topical hook to hang it on. Neat:)

Black Uhuru - Puff She Puff (Live in London)

(95) Coming To An Arrangement.

I hope that life is treating you all well. I am so glad you can join me again for another short tale.
Or should that be a red tail?

The Cramps - All Women Are Bad (Live)

(94) A Disappointment.

Life holds many disappointments. As Simon Cowell  once said "Fuck of Ian,I well call the police again!" Yes he was disappointed the court order had failed. And I am disappointed that Simon Cowell and his devils offspring are still on TV.
 Oh well keep reaching for the stars or stalking them or, well you know ...

Electronic - "Disappointed"

(93) Bunny Bois A re Best.

Bunny girls really are the best aren't they. What sissy would not want to shimmy their cute tail in that costume. I am still not feeling on good writing form so this ones a quick one.
  So who has been watching the ladies beach volley ball. Me!

 

Echo & The Bunnymen - The Cutter (live 1984)

(92) All Dolled Up.

I am still in a rut new caption wise and in a lethargy generally (sigh) so here is one made in March for Dee's D I Y contest then. I do enjoy inanimate captions but do feel a sense of dread i think it would drive one quite mad. So despite the ending  I wrote at the time I  think he might of got released after a little while of punishment. I am just a softy at heart.

New York Dolls - Looking for a Kiss

(91) Big 'N' Beefy.

I'm sorry for not posting last week. I am back on the old stone age computer and its agony trying to do anything on it. Its just so slow. there is an icon that pops up. Loading. continue or kill. after two hours trying to write a caption KILL seemed like a viable option.
 Well I finished the caption this afternoon. I used a bit of magic in this one. that is not the usual transformation I like to use but I really wanted to post something with this daft photo.

Queen - Fat Bottomed Girls (Official Video)

(90) A Time To Shine.

I am having a lazy day today. (But of course made time for this caption. ) I had got a bit sad going through some of my Mothers stuff. old black and white photos some i have never seen. Me a babe in mums arms! Do you guys know photos used to be on paper and uncolored, had to be sent of to be developed?
 So a day in front of the TV The tour DE France at the moment. the F1 racing soon and British super bike motor cycles being recorded. oh and the Euro football later. (The less said about England's team showing!)

The Who - Boris The Spider

(89) A Sharpe Reminder.

Thanks for the messages they are very much appreciated.
Except for the tick in the good box! I am not sure if that was good I did not post or good that my mother died? There is always one LOL. Maybe something to discus in you next therapy session?
 Hey ho, here's this weeks post.

RAMONES - Needles & Pins

Hi folks. This is just a  note to let you know there well be a short hiatus on this blog.
Sadly my Mother past away earlier this week.
In some ways I am glad that her suffering of her last two years is over. But I  well miss her so much.
So a little pause to remember, reflect and appreciate a Mothers love.
See you all again in a week or two.
Ian X

(84)Yokel Knowledge.

The summer solstice. Up early to see the sun up with the local druids and then of to build the wicker man.

(88) If You Can Get Them Flaunt Them.

 Happy Fathers day. I have just been watching the end of the Le Mans 24 hour. The Toyota team had it. Just one lap and three minutes of racing left and then the car broke down to let Porsche take the win.
 And at the other end of racing I saw the  Womens cycling tour of Britain pass by. Alison Tetrick had a one and a half minute lead then but got caught with just fifty meters to the finish..(And turns out she had broken 3 ribs from an earlier crash.)
 Well guess its never over to its over but hang on in there.
  If you fancy a go at making your own captions check out
  http://starzcaptioncontests.blogspot.co.uk/  

(87) A Ripping Yarn.

I glanced into my work in progress file last weekend. There are quite a few modified photos. layouts and false starts in there. Plus some longer tales yet to be completed.. I found a better photo to go with this one so have completed it as a two part caption.
 It is fun to do a longer story just to add a little more detail and pile on more embarrassment for the helpless hero. I could have made it longer still but lets face it my output is not the greatest so it would end up as weeks between posts.
 Talking of long waits. Elena has published a final part to The Pageant the great unfinished tale she made with Wes so if you have waited all this time for climax then check it out here. http://starzinterracialcaptions.blogspot.co.uk/

(86) I Am Iron Man.

A mid week post ! W T F ?

Black Sabbath - Iron Man (Live In Paris 1970)

(85) La Femme De Chambre Francaise.

I'm back. I do not know for how long but hopefully can get back into the swing of things soon and well be able to get some new caption made.
 I still have problems, problems, problems and i am not at 100%. I am becoming a great fan of the afternoon nap. I don't know if its age, stress, my crappy life style or what but i am feeling so run down an,,,ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

R I P Muhammad Ali

(83) Express Mess

Howdy folks. Just a note. If I do not post for a little while do not fret. I could not pay my internet bill so I could be cut of soon. But like Foo Man Cho I shall return. If I can I well prepost. But you know how slow I type.
 The British dairy farms are struggling at present  so of course I recommend you support your local farmer. But if you have the equipment and a sissy to be punished well you just would wouldn't you.
Or is that just me?

Billy Bragg - Milkman of Human Kindness

(82) Memories Of Things Passed.

A lovely warm day  here in the UK. Why did I pick today to tidy the house. I really need a sissy maid. Any offers?

The Ting Tings - That's Not My Name

(81)Double Cross Trouble.

A bank holiday weekend here. Nice. And its not raining. so out in the garden cutting the moss and weeds I like to call my lawn. An older caption originally made for Elena Starz but maybe just maybe time for some writing tomorrow.

Hawkwind Urban Guerilla Official Promo Video

(80)She Lets It All Out. He Would Love To.

So here it is the delayed caption that I messed up last week  re written and with extra added topping.

Prince - Why You Wanna Treat Me So Bad? - 01/30/82 - Capitol Theatre (O...

(79) Wow!

 Another Sunday and another post. Oh how time flies. O K confession time, this is not the caption that I was intending to post. The one I  had almost completed for your delectation went tits up during a final edit and because I am on an old computer and no undo option it became unreadable. (like most of my work I hear you all cry.)
 So it well have to be be all re written again. Do you see how we Bloggers suffer for our incompetence...I mean art.

Kate Bush - Wow (San Remo)

(78) Just As You Think Its All Over.

Well I am back. Kind off. It has not been a good few weeks. An Uncle passing away, the usual mad mother hassles and a dodgy patch with the girl friend. So not been able to string to words together for a caption. Hence an older one for your delectation. I can not remember where i made this for. I really should keep better notes.
 I Hope to be back into the swing of things real soon maybe even complete my growing folder of half finished captions.
 Oh Mudhoney the greatest band EVER! Always there to ease my decent into the mad ness.

MUDHONEY - Into the drink; Get into yours

(77) Pay Up Or Pay For It.

I might be back or I might not. Another scheduled post just in case. Maybe I exist or maybe I am still
wispy and ephemeral?  I do hope  I can still get chocolate Easter eggs !

(76) End With A Bang And Wash Day Blues. (No Pinks)

Fooled you I am not here. A post by the magic of the great Google. I am going to be of line till payday. Curse you Capitalism curse you to hell. At least I can get YouTube on the TV. So I well be all conspiracied up on my return. Did you know the world is flat and/or hollow. And fear the Lizard rulers
 Just two silly ones today. Yes I am wasting my life aren't I.